Sue whoever’s responsible for the app I just shouted at a Facebook ad for, the one that encourages you to pick a Team USA athlete to follow.  I’m pretty sure the notion of paying attention to and cheering only for your own country’s athletes is antithetical to the spirit of the whole damn thing.  Also, the only possible “official restaurant” is the local taverna, pub, cafe, Biergarten, tea shop, or similar venue where real amateur athletes from anywhere might raise a glass.  Boom — billions and billions more moneyburgers served directly to Greece.  And if USOC has the resources to go after gays or fiber artists for violating “its trademark,” somehow failing to respect with appropriate solemnity the hard, hard work it’s put into “creating its brand,” it’s surely the ripest plum on the tree.

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